Jonny Clarke wrote to me and asked me if he it would be ok if he, along with his waterpolo team, swam the 2.9km Auckland State Harbour Crossing to help raise funds for my treatments. Of course I was extremely honored and humbled by this amazing gesture and said yes. All proceeds from sponsoring their swim will be going directly to me to help pay for my GcMAF.
Jonny and the team swim the crossing on November 13th. Thank you guys! You are amazing.

A special thank you also to Hamish (who told Jonny about me) and the team at Mediacom who have donated the radio time to advertise this event for us. An awesome bunch of guys. Thank you for your incredible generosity and taking the time to read my story and want to help. And for making it possible for me to be on the radio!! How cool is that!?  Listen out on More FM and The Edge everyone!  =)

To sponsor the team for their swim, and in turn help me and my family pay for the new treatment I am on, all you have to do is click on the DONATE button to pay via PAYPAL or Visa. Please make sure you put the word SWIM somewhere in the details.

Or you can pay directly into the ‘Hand in Hand for Natalie’ trust account 02-1244-0070800-000

Thank you so much in advance. It means the world to us.

Piha Cuddles

Today I received the first injection of my GcMAF treatment – my new hope.
Michael (from St Benedicts Health) said I might feel tired after a couple of hours – that will be my immune system kicking in.  (I get to administer it myself, at home. Fan-bloody-tastic!)
I don’t think I did feel suddenly tired but then again I have a bad cold and was feeling really tired anyway.
He also said some don’t have their immune system really kick in til week 4 (shot 4) so who knows, maybe the ‘kick start’ is yet to come. Alot of it depends on the condition your immune system is in to start with. For some, its too far gone for this to do any good. I believe I’m still strong with a lot of fight left in me yet – this treatment will work!
There are risks, esp if your cancer is quite advanced and tumours are large as things tend to inflame further before the immune system attacks. Hence why GcMAF is no good for brain cancer as the inflammation can cause too much pressure and result in death. Liver cancer has similar risks. Yes I have lots of mets in my liver, but Michael and I both believe I am strong enough to tolerate whatever may happen before my immune system kicks in and shrinks them! Its possible I will experience no side effects at all. Fingers crossed. At the most I believe I may experience some pains before things get better, but its worth it.

Basically GcMAF is a protein my body should be producing my itself, but isn’t. This protein will kick start my immune system into fighting this cancer. You can read more at www.gcmaf.eu

And you can contact Michael here in NZ at St Benedicts Health in Auckland City www.stbenedictshealthcare.com

I will keep you all posted on my progress. I’ll be having bloodtests every 3wks which should hopefully indicate things improving. It wont happen overnight but I believe it will happen!

As Ive said previously, each vile I purchase lasts 8 weeks ($1030). Michael isn’t sure how long I may need to be on it, but because of the number of metastisies I have, it could be up to a year ($6180).

Thank you to all of those who have donated already which has raised enough to pay for my first vile. You are all amazing! If you want to donate just click on the ‘Donate’ button where you can donate via paypal or go to the ‘Fundraising’  page for a list of acct nos.

Will write again for shot 2 in a weeks time.
Thanks again for all your incredible support.

Love Nat x

Well I think they are wrong. I have always believed that they don’t know me, so they cant tell me when Im going to die. I plan to fight, then fight some more. Im not going to just sit here and say well chemo is done so lets start counting down the days. According to them my time will probably be up around February. WHAT-EV-ER!!!! There is more to fighting cancer than chemo. There is spirit, there is positive thinking, there is attitude, there is hope and there is belief! And to add to all that coming from me, there is now GcMAF!!

You can google and learn all about GcMAF (its produced overseas) That’s what I did after 3 separate suggestions from people I respect to check it out. I then spoke to an advocate for it in NZ who is battling cancer himself and is currently on the treatment, and getting great results.
They tell me with this drug there is a possibility for me to go into remission. And I believe them too!
What do I have to lose? The side effects are minimal if any and it is offering the greatest hope of any other treatment so far – and it doesn’t kill all my good cells while its working. Unlike chemo, it will make me feel better rather than worse.
The basic idea behind it is that it will help boost my immune system back into action to do the job of fighting this cancer and killing cancer cells. As we know the immune system is capable of doing this but something happens that stops it functioning properly – this something can be stress, diet, environment, genes or any given number of things.
Telling someone you really care about that you have decided to stop chemo is not that easy. Immediately they think the big fight is over and probably presume we now just hope for the best. But after I explained to Mum and Dad and family about what I plan to do, I think their minds and hearts are more at ease.
Greg has been amazing as always through this process. When it comes to anything alternative Greg has been my biggest skeptic. Thats just the way he is made. So to hear him be excited about the treatment too just confirms what I already feel – that this is the right move. He still hasnt done the reading on GcMAF yet so he doesnt actually completely know exactly what Im about to start taking but he has been busy looking after me and Jackson and working too. Im sure he will read it soon, aye Greg? – I am starting next week!

Maybe this treatment will buy me 2 mths, maybe it will buy me 5 years, maybe it will buy me a lifetime – to see Jackson grow into a man would be a dream I never thought could ever possibly become a reality again. Maybe I will get to grow old with the love of my life. Maybe I will be that acception to the rule I have felt in my guts I was destined to be from the beginning. But maybe I wont. Like all things I try, Im just going to stay positive, believe in the treatment Im taking and hope, wish and pray for the best. For remission. Like Ive said, I have nothing to lose. You will never see my hands in the air… unless Im playing airplanes with Jackson.

This treatment is going to cost me $1030 for an 8 week course – one injection per week. Its possible I will only need 8 weeks worth. It more likely I will need more than this. For metastisies like mine, I could need anything up to a year’s worth to see a full recovery (costing $6180). If you would like to help us pay for these treatments it would be humbly and gratefully received. You can make a donation by clicking on the donation button on the right via Paypal or depositing directly into our bank acct: Natalie & Greg Murphy 02-0238-0116716-97
Thank you in advance. We can never truly thank everyone enough.

Please feel free to send me lots of positive vibes, prayers and belief that this treatment will help me.
Thank you for all your continual, mind blowing support.

All my love
Nat xx

They were awesome when I got there. But after 3 x-rays, they found nothing. It could be any of 3 or 4 things. 1. trapped air/gas. 2. A virus or 3. The cancer could have spread onto the outer lining of  my stomach causing inflammation and therefore pain as it presses on surrounding organs. 4. The cancer in my liver is inflammed and pressing on my stomach/large intestine.
All i know is it feels like a knife is in me and if I move it feels like someone is turning it. I got doped up with lots of morphine but it didn’t help, it only made me sleepy.
Im now back home again with a huge bag full of drugs including morphine, steroids and anti-nausea - oh and a fair bit of laxatives too just in case. I’ll be honest, dont plan on using any of it. Don’t believe the morphine helps and Idon’t believe im just constipated.
Im ok, Im better sitting up and Im fine lying down as long as its on my back and I dont move. Joy. On top of this Jackson is sick with a bad cold, temp and diarrhoea so he is super needy and wanting cuddles and I cant even pick him up. So hard. Poor little guy! =(
Hopefully it will pass. Im sure it will. Abdominal stuff is so frustrating. They often cant find the cause and you are left to just hope its nothing serious or find out the hard way that it is. They were great to me though and I didnt have that feeling of wanting to run out the door like I usually do so that was nice.  I really missed Jackson though and couldnt wait to see him when I got home…only to have him run past me and to Grandad LOL!  I got a cuddle eventually =)

I know I sound down and I guess thats normal when you are in pain. But dont worry about me, I always bounce back. Im a tough nut!
I have more news though….see my next post….

I had a CT Scan a few weeks ago now, following the not so good blood result.

It was as we had feared. Things have progressed. The weird thing is my largest tumour in my liver has shrunk from 4.5cm to around 2.5cm. But the other 5 tumours in the liver have grown at least another centimetre. And they think a new one is showing also.

Plus there is a new spot on my T7 in my spine and they think a spot on my right hip. Not good. But strangely my liver function result getting better. Go figure. I guess it is because the largest tumour that was causing the most strain has shrunk maybe…? Who knows.

They arent really sure what to do next. My oncologist wants to chat with the radiologist and get a better ‘picture’ from him as to what he thinks is going on. They will then have a meeting about me and decide what the next plan of attack is.

In the meantime I am to continue at least 2 more rounds of the chemo I am on (Capesidabine). They will then do another blood test to see if my tumor marker has improved at all. The last blood test showed it was going back up again. Before chemo my tumor marker (CA15-3) was 117. Then it dropped to 67 then to 56 then to 57 then to 79 (last one) so that means that although I was doing well, things are now progressing.

Im ok, staying strong and positive. I still believe I am going to beat this thing, at least to the extent where I will not be going anywhere in 6mths time like their prognosis in late Jan. I still feel good. Just have a few more headaches and back pain lately. The red swollen, ‘glass in the feet’ feeling that chemo brings each cycle is manageable and doesn’t really get me down at all. The only other side effects have been tiredness, irritable moods and dry, cracking/splitting skin around my finger tips. None of which I let get me down. It could be so much worse. The downer is really what the next step may bring. If they decide they want to try me on a different type of chemo that will more than likely mean losing all my hair again. Im not sure yet whether I could go through that all again but will cross that bridge when I come to it. Now that Jackson is that much older Im a bit worried how he will react too or deal with me not being able to play with him at times, which was easier managed when he was a lot younger with the first round of chemo.

Anyways, thats all from me. Will let you all know when I know whats happening next.

On a side note,  Greg and I are renewing our wedding vows in March – it will be our 10th wedding anniversary!! Have no idea where that time went! We are fundraising to try and get a bit of a second honeymooon – just to Oz as Ive only ever been to Sydney and Melbourne and the last time I was there was about 12yrs ago!!! If you would like to donate towards our honeymoon (with Jackson) please go to www.helpnat.com

Thanks everyone for all your on-going support. You all blow my mind and Im eternally grateful!!!

Love Nat xxx

Unfortunately, as i shared the other day, i’ve been having some pains which were concerning me a bit. Today I found out my bloods are indicating that the last round of chemo did not work as well as the previous. My liver function has dropped after it was doing so much better and my tumor marker has gone up again instead of plateuing or dropping dropping further which is what we were obviously all hoping for. This isnt great news but we are not panicing just yet. They dropped my dose a little last time due to some side effects I was having so they are thinking this is possibly why my stats since then are not as good – even though they promised me at the time that it wasn’t going to be any less effective. So, Im now back on the increased dose as of this Saturday which Im ok with I guess but I was enjoying having about 15% more energy, not so sore feet and hands, and feeling a bit more capable towards the end of the second week rather than a strung out, irritable psycho at times. So we shall see how it goes this time around.

After I get back from Queenstown I will be having CT scan (Mon 11th) to see how my tumors are looking, literally, rather than just going by a blood count which is not that accurate. They will make a call from that as to whether they will continue me on the Capesidabine or whether we try another drug. Joy.

So fingers, toes etc etc are crossed as the goal is obviously to stay on this drug as long as possible and keep things steady and manageable rather than having to try something else. The sooner we have to try other drugs, the sooner we run out of other drugs to try. Would like to stay on this for years please!!!! Are you listening God!!!!!?????? A cure would be nice too =)

NICOLA RUSSELL

This morning Natalie Murphy got breakfast in bed and flowers from her 22-month-old son Jackson.

It’s special because Natalie’s doctors think this Mother’s Day will be her last, although she’s determined to fight.

“Elephant,” Jackson says, introducing his favourite toy – one Natalie gave him the day he was born. Eight months later she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Then, just minutes from a mastectomy, she and husband Greg were told the cancer was in her liver, and that she had two to five years.

She had chemotherapy, but a scan in January showed her tumours were back, bigger than before. She was told she had a year to live.

“When I was given five years, I was convinced I’d live 10. So to have somebody take my worst-case scenario and make it real …”

Today is the 12th anniversary of meeting Greg, who says Natalie shines as a mum every day.

“To watch someone go through this with a smile and still be a mother is amazing. She’s used Jackson as motivation, that’s what gets her up.” That and Greg, who went part-time this month to spend more time at home.

Natalie says: “Because I’m tired, sometimes I’m unmotivated. Greg puts Jackson in the car and before I know it I’m like, `oh, thanks for getting me out of the house’.”

Her latest treatment means she can be at home.

After her first cycle she was told her tumour marker was down.

“I said to Greg, `I’m so going to be here longer than a year’. Everything inside me says a minimum of two years, three hopefully.”

Normal things, like Mother’s Day, are important. “When we don’t have plans we just enjoy being together. When you are faced with your own mortality, that stuff is special,” Natalie says.

She and Greg put Jackson first. “We do family stuff, walks, and the park is his favourite.”

But sometimes she thinks of something she must write down, something she knows she won’t be there to tell him when he’s a teenager.

“Greg and I are going to work on a book of things I want him to do – and not to do – with Jackson.”

The trained beauty therapist wants to help women undergoing chemo who have lost their hair. The first 10 to contact her at www.helpnat.com will get a lesson from Natalie on drawing on eyebrows, making lost eyelashes less noticeable and modern ways to wear your scarf and where to get them from! Natalie has been through this herself and was thankful for her skills to help her better through the hardship of losing all your body hair.

Your Mother’s Day paper is pink for the Breast Cancer Cure Research Trust, with 10c from every paper sold at retail helping the trust help women like Natalie.

So I wake up on Mothers Day knowing I was going to have an article in the paper…I was looking forward to reading it as I had no idea what was going to be said after an almost 2hr interview. Greg made me breakfast in bed and Jackson brought me flowers, then Greg went and got me a copy.
You can imagine my surprise when I saw myself plastered largely on the front page!! The article was lovely but those that know me best will know Im hard to please when it comes to things being written about my story…. I just wish THE WHOLE STORY could be said, just to get the awareness out there as much as I can but hey there’s just never enough space! I was a little disappointed there wasnt more of a push about checking yourself early etc but it would seem the angle was more just a mother’s day story about a not so ordinary mum’s circumstances..? Anyway, just thank ful that I was asked to do it and my website was noted so that those who wanted to can go there and read the FULL story If you havent seen it you can see it online here….http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/4976259/Fight-for-another-Mothers-Day

Thanks so much to everyone who has written to me and even donated since reading this article.  And to all of those who continue to follow me on facebook and via my website and continue to show your love and support every step of the way. You all play a very special part in my story. x

Unsure yet how long I will be on it for, it all depends on how well I respond to it. At least I wont lose my hair this time =)

Spent the last 3 days suffering with Gastro which gave me a scare at first, thinking it was the cancer and me going down hill. Then Greg got it. What a relief haha. But we suffered together which was kinda nice.

I have a bowl CT Scan on Monday 4th April as things have been quite painful in that area. Then chemo starts the next day.

Thats all from me. Dont forget Music GIG is on next Thurs, love to see you there!!

Nat =)